Que Sera Sera

P.S : The post is dedicated to my most passionate dreams till date – my childhood dreams .

When I was just a little girl
I asked my mother, what will I be
Will I be pretty, will I be rich
Here’s what she said to me…..

My parents say that when  I was a kid I wanted to be everything that  I observed in my vicinity and that pleased my heart (just like every other child). All that I remember from my memory are  few catchy professions that were in the hit list of my dreams.  I wanted to be a truck driver back there in 1^st standard, I use to love the trucks and tractors as they were big and spacious. Then as I grew up ‘A for Aeroplane’ looked more catchy than any other road vehicle  and thus I wanted to be  a pilot. We kids use to run out of our home or classrooms to see whenever we heard a plane or a helicopter roaring in the wide sky. Soon, a little more  understanding of this world made me  realized it is not the pilot but the airhostess that makes everyone travel in the plane. And soon my daydreams shifted from being a pilot to airhostess.  But then I was from a very little town where airhostesses were not considered as respectable as any other normal job. My convent teacher used to get more respect than the brave and beautiful airhostess that used to come in promotional advertisements of various airlines.  And so I wanted to be a teacher. This was the profession for which I really dreamt a lot, not just dreamt but I practiced  too with my instant ‘be-a-teacher’ kit, I used to wear high heels of my elder sis, wrap her long colourful duppattas around my waist and  other accessories like wooden scale, chalks, a cloth as a duster and a door on which I could scribble, I used to spend hours teaching virtual students in an empty living room or my dad.  The irony is that I loved this profession even when I didn’t love the very thought of going to school .  From standard L.K.G to 2^nd I have bunked as much school as I can, I use to run away from the school gate and wander on streets and get back to home when a whole bunch of vehicles (especially autos) on the road headed in the direction of my school.  My dad used to be my favorite and most tortured student. He used to allow me to practice all kinds of evil practises that I saw my teachers doing in the school, like hitting hard on his hand with wooden scale, make him read whatever I wrote on the board (used to be the door of mom-dad’s bedroom) not once but again and again and cunningly find where he is wrong etc .   It was in 6^thstandard when I realized my habit of not sharing the thoughts with anyone when it comes about the dark or gloomy part of my brain . I started writing diary. I have 6 diaries of my childhood and believe me, my reasons of sadness in those days serve as a potential source of humour to anyone, at anytime :/  Since then I keep on scribbling depending on the mood and the inspiration.

As years passed, I grew up and got to know that there exist better jobs than playing in playground or teasing my siblings.  I saw this famous movie ‘Titanic’, had no clue by then why people made a hype about beautiful Kate Winslet and her famous bold scene ‘cause I watched it with my family on Star Gold and thus all the unwanted scenes were deleted from it. :/ Anyway, the post effects of Titanic were two more passions in my life. I wanted to join Navy but then this thought didn’t last for long as I   I also wanted to become a painter, someone who could bring every thought of his mind on canvas with beautiful colors.  Thanks to this new likeness that I actively participated in  various drawing competitions that used to happen in my town every other weekend for social causes or by public welfare organisations. I have memories printed in newspapers and mind of the same . ^_^

Time rolled on, my elder brother and mischief buddy got into 11^th and me in 9^th. That day, his class teacher and my dad had serious discussion in parent teacher discussion, they were discussing how our society is governed by prejudices about class of professions and thus majority  end up choosing the same direction viz Engineers, Lawyers and Doctors. He had chosen maths out of three life deciding options. And all of sudden I felt really that a very tough and important decision is going to meet me soon. Then I and my dad mutually decided that I wish to become a Doctor (No pun intended). Yes, I so whole heartedly wanted to be a doctor, someone who treats everyone and has a power to cure which is Godly, someone who can read the heartbeats  and someone who gets a lot of presents and accessories  from the various companies every day.  

Life became a lot simple and focused then, till I passed my high school. But then my brother didn’t let me take Biology and asked me to take maths and sooner than it seemed, life turned around. The girl who use to curse cubic equations and its interruption in my peace of mind, finally set the same as her major arena of interest.  Soon, I landed in the best engineering college of the country, that is a neighbour to the best medical college too. :/

Over here , after crossing so many laps of various phases and faces of life when I saw IIT as my ending point and desired destination,  I found myself again on the starting point . There is hardly any difference in my thinking and clarity of  aims now when compared to my school time.  I would still love to become a truck driver , a painter, a pilot or a teacher but then now approach has changed . It was a lot more simpler to believe that  dreams can be brought to reality, which is not the present case. People call it wisdom and maturity, I call it vagueness and confusion.

I study books which teach me engineering but I love management and operations more than it . I love music more than management but then I love writing more than music. At times, I feel the existence of the ‘power of youth’ in me and I get inclined for bringing a change in the system and thus civil services  is what I look for but then I think about creativity and creations, and thus the loop is set back to engineering .

May be I am way behind the ones who are of my age, when I say that for me the question asked me ‘Surf Excel’ advertisement is still unanswered, i.e mujhe ban na hai _________?, but then that is the reality.

Que Sera, Sera,
Whatever will be, will be
The future’s not ours, to see
Que Sera, Sera
What will be, will be.

Childhood dreams were the most passionate ones as there were no worries and doubts about achieving them when thought, there was just two things – faith and imagination, it was as simple as ‘Dream it, achieve it’.  Hoping that self exploration will come to an end soon and will show me what actually I love and what is my purpose on this earth.

P.S :1) ‘Que Sera Sera’ is a Spanish phrase which means  ’What to be to be’.
         2) ‘Que Sera Sera’ is a beautiful song sung by .
         3) The first P.S was meant for Pre Script. Yes ,I know it is silly but then I had no other choice but do it.

"LEAVE ME ALONE.."

                   

Especially dedicated to AMI...

“stop crying! M not born to wipe your tears” armaan howled as he heard priya’s sobbing.

“oh! Yeah ...i m not crying  for you ..but ‘cause of you . my life was far much better and easy before you entered in it”  with wet eyes and red cheeks , priya replied trying to hold her sobs.

“i entered....i agree. I made your life a heck..i agree. Why don’t you throw me out from your simple and easy life. I never told you to share my chats with you with that moron  gaurav.”  Aman ‘s wrath was unbeatable.

“but trust me, i didn’t mean it in any negative sense” priya said wiping her tears with her extra long sleeved sweater.

“i don’t trust you...you get that?” aman glowered. Its aman,  whenever he lost his temper,he would never speak in his senses.

Priya was stunned for a second or two. she gathered all her courage and patience and spoke “aman! I m sorry .. he is our friend and thats why...”

“then kindly leave me alone and go and share your world with your dear friend “ aman cut off her mid sentence.

“you don’t mean it..right? “ priya was perplexed.

“i do. You are a jerk in my life ...leave me alone. “

“ aman... you never try to understand the other side of the coin..”

“i m sensible enough to make my own rules and understandings... “

“.  I m really sorry for myself that i considered you as my friend. fuck you aman “

“just leave... priya. You said it all..just leave” his voice softened .aman  was shocked to hear such an offensive word   from her and that too for him.

Priya stood up and fixed her eyes to his gaze.

“i m sorry !”

“i’ve lost all my dignity with your words. Feels as if  i’m grounded to a guilt never worse .dont make it worse by your presence. Just leave”

she left.

He heard her  foot steps accompanied by her sobbing.

 “its  ok aman! Just forget and forgive. Why to take  something said in anger  in such a serious manner? “ shikha, aman’s girlfriend tried convincing him.

“i don’t want to see her again in my life .she crossed her limits this time. No more discussions on this topic.” Aman pleaded.

Priya and aman were friends since years and some sort of unique understanding existed in between these two souls.  Their bonding strengthed every time they fought ‘cause none use to hold the grudges and stay away from the other.

But this time it was more than just a tiff. And months passed but they didn’t talk.

They became disconnected in  the most unexpected way. Both got busy in their lives and  no one bothered about the other.

 time “tried” healing the grief of sepration.

“aman. Its priya on the other side” shikha said to aman handing him her cell.

Aman couldn’t believe her ears and in reflex he took the cell and said ... “priya? “

“hey! Hi... i hope i didn’t disturb you guys “ priya managed to start the talk .

“no...  its fine.”

“can we meet tomorrow.? “

“yeah ,sure.” Aman didn’t oppose because he wished the same.

They met. It was the usual place of their meetings days back but the crowd and so does the place felt so unusual to both of them.

“hi!” aman waved as he saw priya coming to his seat.

“hey! “ she smiled.

“so how are you? Its been ages since m talking to you ? “aman  examined her face thoroughly.

“i m fine. How have you been? “

“ great. Everything’s going well.”with few more formal gestures and question answers an hour passed.

“ i got to go. mom must be waiting at home.” Priya said.

“sure. I ll escort you.” Aman smiled.

“priya you look so dull . why? “ aman asked on a serious note while walking on  the footpath.

“i need to inform you something. “ her voice broke as  she finished her statement. She got fixed to her place and spoke.

“priya ! what happened? “ aman reached for her hand . the sudden change in her voice made him shiver from top to bottom.    

Priya made a grip on his palms and contolled the balance of her voice and said “aman, i  have cancer in my lungs.”

“ nooooo.... “ aman screamed.

“ its in third stage .”  tears rolled down her cheeks.

“noooooo...it cant be. You cant be” aman was almost breaking .

“ i wanted to tell you something.....i m sorry for whatever mess i made in your life. But  trust me aman, you were one of  the best  soul i ‘ve ever met. And  i thank you for making my life extremely beautiful with your presence. And i mean it...you were the reasons of my smile. “  her  voice broke  as aman clasped her in his arms.

“dont ....please....i beg you please dont leave me alone”  

 They wept inconsolably.

 And  prayed for the time to stop the very moment for forever.

P.S

# 1)  greeting cards  generally conatins  the  beautiful tag lines  like“ show them their worth " " express to them they are special" etc.

I personally don’t believe in relations (of any kind) , commitments  or the related stuff , but disbelief doesn’t begets  disrespect. I do respect the faith of the people  in  relations and emotions. 

Show your friends,family and everyone you infllunced your life, their worth in your life before it gets too late or before it changes for the worst.  Define your relations before they disappear.  Tell them that  you miss them before they get away from you to such a distance that your voice may become inaudible for them.   Before you realise that you are the worst person to make and maintain a relation tell how  perfect they are in holding   their relationship with you.

Trust me you ll feel content as never before  when you ll express yourself in the most genuine way... that how much you love them. This not something cheesy to do but the most beautiful thing to do..”EXPRESS the most beautiful feeling created by HIM”

 Unlike my previous write ups i don’t wish  for comments but for people to express their feelings to their fellowmates.

2)I request you not  to use  your extra brains and enquire me about ami.  Ami is a French word for “friend.”
3)  i apologise  to all those  to whom i promised to come with some other stuff this time. would certainly post the decided writeups in couple of dayz.
4) thank u all for being there in ma lyf and adding colors in it.:):)

beginning of "the end" ...

(sequel of the previous post..."you" )
“ now since you have read what my heart stores there is only one question I wish to ask ….. will you be my date?



I m madly in love with you sweetheart!


This was the end from my part and m still waiting for an end…. From your side.”



 

The dumbfounded girl finished reading her life on pages and that too in armaan’s words. She kept staring at the book. Her brain was not ready to react the sudden blow of mixture of anonymous emotions. she reread the last chapter again. Armaan’s face was running in front of her eyes. The first meet when she saw him how perfect his personality looked to her....the way he was a boss and a friend at the same time .....the way his maturity reflected in his actions and that was the reason she couldn’t stay annoyed with him for long..... how much she hated his boyish chats whenever he and aman sat together in the reading room,library, cafes and commented on every other girl passed ... which she termed as cheap behaviour ... and how much she use to feel delighted by his presence whenever he showed the respect for his female friends and use to take the responsibility of each of them whenever they were out with him for any reason. She loved him as his senior who was matured and she loved him more when he use to make faces and do immature acts just for convincing his angry friends to forgive him for his irresponsible behaviour ...... she hated him when he used to call her a kid but she use to love whenever he use to hold her hands while crossing the roads or while strolling in some overcrowded place ...as if she is a kid for doing such ‘tough’ jobs.

“he didn’t know why he wanted her so much at that moment. He was falling for her as every second passed “ esha was staring at these words of the article.

she couldn’t believe that a guy who is the matinee idol of  many gorgeous females....has written that he was falling for a silly girl with the tick of the hands of the clock... The feeling of sudden intense sensation made her eyes wet and tears rolled down her cheeks and her nose became as red as a cherry.



“the event ‘colors of your words’ is gonna start within next 10 mins .all the participants and interested folk kindly report in lecture theatre on the first floor... “ the announcement broke esha’s train of thought . she wiped her tears and kept the book back in the shelf . she took her bag and headed towards the venue. With numerous thoughts in her head about armaan and her life with him in past year she hardly paid any attention on her dream competition. As she entered the room filled with around 150 people her eyes opposed her brains and searched armaan .

“ ready for the result “ armaan jumped over a bench and landed in front of her.

Esha was startled ‘cause of both armaan and his words. She was amazed to see him in his normal self. Unlike her he was not at all nervous, without any thoughtful expression . then she realised its him- armaan the coolest dude and not the epitome of some silly nervousness.

“what happened kid? Why so serious? “ armaan tickled her fancy .

“ ummm.,...i ..” she struggled with the words to find a proper reply but she her tounge and brain didn’t coordinate to make a reply.

“ forget about everything right now ...its the D DAY .“ he lowered his head and whispered in her ears.

She tittered .

“lets move to our seats.” He took her hand and headed towards the front row reserved for the participants.esha could feel the hold of his hand was different than that on ususl days or may be it was just her imagination that was making her feel the difference.

The organisers welcomed everyone and the after few more speeches from judges and guest of honour they reached to the most awaited moment of the competition. All participants crossed their fingers and esha closed her eyes tightly and thought how much she wished to win this competition.

“ the jury has decided the result and the lucky winners of the participants are megha dutta and aditi kumar of stefens college for their creation “ love ,life and lust “ . the applause of audience congratulated the victors.

Esha stared at the judges sitting on the stage and armaan gazed at shocked esha.

“ and i feel proud to announce that colors of shade is highly honoured to give a special appreciation accolade to esha gupta and armaan Mehta for their beautiful creation “you”.

Esha and armaan cheered loudly...”woooooow” ! esha jumped towards armaan for an hug but stopped a step before.

“c’mom .. esha i deserve a friendly hug as an co-author ,though i accept i have contributed a bit less in the story. “ armaan chuckled as he pulled her to give her a tight hug.

the winners were requested to read the favourite abstract from their respective stories. After the first place winners armaan stepped on the stage to read the abstract.

As expected by esha he opened the last chapter and started reading it. The words were now filled with feelings and his mellifluous voice made the atmosphere more seducing.

The emotional part of armaan was extremely fresh for esha and so she kept staring at him in surprise . as he reached the last part the story he fixed his eyes on esha and quoted the last lines ....” now since you have read ....... still waiting for an end from you “.

Esha blushed and her beautiful eyes dilated as if pleading armaan to stop.

The audience acclaimed and armaan came down from the stage and stood nest to esha. Soon after certificate distribution and few meetings with people and friends the day passed . The joy of being appreciate d and a small party organised by armaan’s friend was enough for esha to stay in her normal self . . Esha and armaan finally got free and were set to step out of the stefens .

As soon as they sat in the auto , the thoughts of armaan and his love again started haunting esha’s mind. From the very idea that finally both them are alone was making her nervous like anything .

“so congratulations miss.writer . you have done a good job. Keep it up” . armaan chortled.

“same to you” she smiled back.

“hmmm.... do you want me to start or you would like to say something.” Armaan enquired.

“ ummmm....can we leave the discussion for better place “ she pleaded.

“Ohk no problem.”

the auto stopped in front of the college gate .armaan and esha headed towards the park near their institute campus.

“i need to mke a thing clear. There is nothing to worry about and to get tensed . i ll always cherish a beautiful relation between you and me which is known as “friendship”. “armaan assured as they strolled in the almost empty park.

“ ok” esha reassured.

“so i should take it as a ‘no’ ? “ armaan asked innocently.

Esha simply kept quiet and stared at him.

“why are you so nervous ? what are you worrying about ...there’s nothing to cause an headache . just be yourself.”armaan sensed the cause of silence.

“armaan ! honestly speaking i myself don’t know what m i feeling and what i want” she uttered

“that means yes “

“no”

“thats means a no”

“no...not that no”

“hmmm.....you are confused.thats a signal for a no”

“ armaan! My feelings are vague for my own self. i don’t know why but its a bit tough for me to believe in your belief in feelings .you have never been so emotional before....atleast as far as i have seen you. You hardly showed any positive indication for commitment and love stuff . the moment i see you i feel as if you are born to enjoy the life at fullest. i like whenever you are around but i cant assure to myself that is it the samne thing for you i m not saying that you are not a trustworthy person infact i believe you are really a faithful guy and any girl would be lucky to get you as her partner but still i doubt on you whether you know the depth of words you are saying “ esha pour down her heart in a breathe.

Armaan moved a step closer and the girl was spell bound to find him so close without any expressions.

“ you are right when you say i don’t understand what love and crap is. Trust me even after realising my thoughts for you ...i still find rock bands far much better than your mushy romantic songs. And may be that shows my poor knowledge of depth of love and life. I just know one thing... “ he kept speaking and esha could feel the warmth of his breathe that she herself forgot to breathe in some air

“i just know one thing in this context that when it comes to you ...i don’t know what but something makes you simply makes you carve for the other....”



By this time no one sighed but he pressed his lips against hers.

The kiss was sudden but very gentle,.... full of love...full of careful thoughts ...full of an anonymous faith ...full of sn internal desire to hold and embrace ..full of support and understanding.

None opposed ... and the kiss lasted for a minute or two . esha finally moved away from him...and her eyes stared at the dead leaves fallen from the trees as if trying to bring them in life.

Armaan lets his heart talk,speaking through his eyes. His eyelashes never took so long to blink,fearing she might go away.his heart never pounded so hard,loud enough for esha to hear it.even a single smile of her could prove lethal. In his mind flooded the memories they shared and the fear of loosing her. He seemed completely oblivious to the surroundings,as esha was the only thing which bothered him. As of now esha was his world,his destination.

“esha! I love you”

She didn’t reply.

“i m ready to accept your answer wholeheartedly ...atleast  tell me  what you are thinking”

“ i m wondering how can i fall in love with a guy who don’t even like lucky ali “ she smiled.

“ you are sick! I hate you gal! You almost took my soul out from my body” armaan cheered and reached to her for an hug.

YOU

“excuse me! “


Armaan turned back when some one patted his back just to find a beautiful and cute girl standing in front of him with a tense expression.


“ya! “armaan asked her .


“I wa-n-te-d your he-l-p.” she tried putting all the words together.


Armaan smiled and sensed the reason of her nervouseness .


“sure. Tell me how can I help you.”


“can y-o-u he-l-p me in ….”


“girl! Don’t hesitate . ask me frankly! “ armaan told her politely.


Esha cleared her throat . “can you help me to find a date for me. I m a lesbian and I wish t ogo out with a hot chick ! “ she said in one breathe and closed her eyes tightly.


Armaan roared in laughter “whaaat? You are what? Oh! Man that’s pretty hilarious . …who asked you to do that! “


“eh….no-one! “


“no-one …ahaan!! Don’t worry kid you can tell me …m in third year and I guess m senior to your dear seniors who decided your orientation” armaan said her smiling.


“never mind sir…its fine . I ll be glad if you tell me the names of two hot friends of yours.”


“tell them I asked you for a date . “


“errrr…”


“ohkk….shweta and nayan. Satisfied ?”


“thanx a lot sir”


“ I would be glad if nest time you ask me for a date instead of my girlfriends “ armaan winked .


“I wish the same sir .thanks once again.bye” esha chuckled and turned back .


“whats your name ,by the way?”


“esha”

 the next year.....

“Tch tch”…. armaan hit the desk making a sound loud enough to force the future CEOs ans IAS (cat and civil services aspirants ) to take a wild break from their books and give a disgusting look to these silly ,aimless youth. It was off exam season and the college reading room was full of competition seeking folk and few unfortunate people like armaan and esha who got stuck in some work and finally decided to complete it just a night before its submission.


Armaan ‘cause of his genes hardly gave a damn to anyone in his surrounding. Its neither his superbia nor his fluctuating arrogance but his experience and desire for perfection in everything he steps in that made his attitude ..”whatever I do…its right”.
“tch tch…” this time the tap was not on the desk but on esha’s head which was on sheets of paper she was working with.


“Eh!! Whaaat? “ she opened her sleep filled eyes and miffed. Though drowsy but her eyes with beautiful mild sea greenish shade looked beautiful and was enough to act as a drug for anyone who is hooked to beauty.


“How can you doze off ,esha? Dammit ,how can you behave so careless at this hour? This is heights of… “ armaan codded vexedly.


Both of them were working as a team on a story which was to be submitted in a literature fest of DU. It was a big deal for them to clear the prelims and be a part of the such a grand competition. They were working on the story since two weeks but armaan being a busy senior couldn’t devote passable time to this writing thing and esha inspite of all her efforts was unable to drag armaan to it. Anyway the dead line arrived and it was the red alert time for both of them.


Poor esha,really had a long day . she was busy collecting the essential stuff required for making a suitable and presentable draft for their story, apart from her minor project and lab report submission. Two days continuous work and inadequate sleep was taking her unintensionally in nap.


“I was not …asleep.i was thinking..” esha cut off mid statement and replied exasperatedly . She tried defending herself with a silly excuse but with a serious experession.


“oh yeah…!! “ he rose his one eyebrow. “ may I know what this little writer was thinking”


“I think the hero should be more polite and understanding. That ll make the life of our love birds easy. “ esha taunted.


“was that a taunt? “


“no !it is the requirement”


“you did that again… you think I m not polite”


“It hardly matters what I think. I guess we should switch on to our story”
“sure….lets continue from the part 2 …I think the gal should accept the way he is” armaan ‘s choler washed away and he started working.


Esha glowered.


“whaat?? I m talking about the hero and the heroine.” Armaan made a genuine response.


“hmmm..” esha murmured.


“ lets continue …”


Both of them kept their childish arguments aside and started working. Under armaan ‘s nose Esha didn’t even dare to close her eyes for more than a sec. The best part about armaan was that he was a really good at critical thinking and was fast enough to bring out new ideas. And one of the worst thing about him was that at times he was the beast of the den. It was really tough for people around him to counter his logics even if they knew he is not absolutely correct. It use to take esha a good deal of energy to manage with him ..to argue with him...to cooperate and follow his orders ….


“did you retouch the introductory description of the guy and gal….? “ armaan asked pulling out a headphone from her ear.


“ummm…” she turned her laptop towards him.


“good…,.. no errors…..no useless length…..” armaan analysed.


“hey!!! Why did you change my song? “ esha inquired
.
“you have got a very poor taste of music, gal!! just adding a flavor to your music…the real music “ armaan grimmed and smiled!


“ no taste??….wtf! lucky ali sounds meaningful atleast and the rest in my playlist don’t scream and wail as your dear rock bands do ….as if mourning on someone’s death…” she forcefully turned the screen and switched the previous soundtrack on.


“why do you girls fall for this nitwitted and buncombe lyrics? I mean how can be some one soo silly to cry with such fantasies and that too all time. ? “ armaan chuckled .


“ ohhhh..please! emotions armaan….emotions!! something that is out of your reach. “ esha gave him a fake smile.


“hmmm…. Quiet engrossing..haha!! “


“you are sick. And that is the reason you don’t have a girlfriend.”


“girlfriend!!!!! Now this is something out of the blue….. anyway as per as my knoweldege the reason I don have a girlfriend is that I never proposed any girl till date. “


“whaaaat??? Seriously !!! you never did? You don’t look like a timid boy!!! “ esha asked in her same innocent tone .


“yeah kiddo!….. whats so surprising. Its just that I have never felt for any girl seriously and for fun I have many chicks to go around with me .” he winked. Armaan was counted among the heartthrobs of the college and he actually was the most eligible dude for making a decent boyfriend. And esha cant deny the fact as she had heard alot about armaan in her hostel.


“oh yeah …mr.indian tom cruise :P .But I really don’t believe this…that you never felt for a girl.”


“and why do you think so?”


“because you are the perfect boy friend material….atleast your outlook potrays that”.


“perfect boyfriend material…sounds interesting….kindly elaborate.”


“will certainly do…once we finish this story.” Esha showed the red light to the out of content topic and they shifted their gazes back on the respective lapton screens.


"by the way....you als odont have a boy friend ....that means you are also rude!" armaan pulled her leg.


" shut up! " esha snarled as armaan grinned.


Another tacit hour passed. The pedagogues squirmed on their places in definite time intervals and some kept being on and off for coffee breaks.


“don’t you think you are forgetting something? “ esha brokethe silence and questioned armaan who was busy scribbling on paper.


“huh? What? “ he gave a shufti to her and started scribbling again.


“ its aman’s birthday tomorrow. And I guess you ought to wish him as the clock strikes 12! Aint u? “ esha said pointing towards the clock .


Aman and armaan were friends since the first day of the college. Both of them were each other’s soul. From pranks to play they almost did everything together.


“fuck! How can I forget that? “ armaan searched his pocket for the cellphone.


“hey bro! janmdin Mubarak ho yaar” he wished aman with a grin. “And esha too wishing you the same”.


After few gestures armaan fixed her gaze on esha who was busy typing something on her laptop. Esha noticed it and raised her eyebrows intending to ask “what happened?”


“ohk ill be there in 10 mins” armaan answered aman on phn.


“don’t tell me... you are planning to take a break for a birthday treat.” Esha reflected
.
“please sweetheart! Its aman’s birthday. I ll be back in 20 mins . and invited both of us …lets go and take a short break” armaan tried convincing her in his most seducing voice.


“armaan!both of us know it wont be a short break. We are running short of time ,I hope you remember that. And aman is very well aware of the urgency of your presence over here ,I m sure he wont feel bad if you don’t go over there now.” Esha protested his idea of taking a break from the work.


“oh! C’mon esha. It wont take more than half an hour. Lets move.” Armaan kept persuading.


“ohk then ! do whatever you want but I m not coming. I ll do the joining part of the write ups! “ esha growled.


“you are really a sweet kid . thanx sweety…I promise Il be back in 30 mins. “ armaan picked his jacket and bid her bye.


“don’t forget to bring my share of birthday cake. And convey my apologies to him” esha smiled.


“sure” armaan vanished from the place in secs.


Esha started her work again . from joining all the write-ups and making soft copies of armaan’s scraps.With many other soundtracks ,passed another heavy hour . esha though slowly but kerp working on the story.
It was at 2;30 when armaan hurried back in the almost empty reading room.
He prepared himself mentally for facing esha. He was feeling damn guilty and whole through out his way he kept repeating the words of apology that he was about to say the girl.


As soon as he got back to his seat , he found esha sleeping.




The hold of a pen in her curled fingers was exihibited that she dozed pff while working. Armaan habituated hands reachd her head with an intension to wake her up. But he stopped and simply swayed his hands on her hair. He took his seat as softly as possible for completing the work. . the almost done work arouse the pathos and dug his guilt even more. He gave a caring look to the poor gal who was sleeping very deeply. Armaan stared at her for more than a min and closed his eyes to wishing to wake her up and apologise. But he didn’t ‘cause he knew how desperately she needed rest and how much she deserve to take a break.He took the headphones out from her ears and tried taking her laptop without making a sound. After fifteen minutes he realized that still the story was incomplete …the end was not yet decided and thus was not written. Armaan finally decided to wake her up ‘cause he couldn’t decide the end alone…. He stood up and sat beside her.


“esha! “ he wishpered in her ear.


“esha…wake up ! hey! “ he tried once again and patted on her hands.


Esha was sleeping so profoundly that armaan’s efforts didn’t result in any fruit. Armaan couldn’t take his gaze away from her face. Her innocent face which was looking prettier was delighting his senses. Unlike when she is awake…her face was peaceful ,serene …with no worries ..without any responsibilities …without any pressure…without wrath…without any irritation…it was just “her” in her own world. Armaan kept his head on the desk just to come in level of her eyes.
He muttered again…”esha! Wake up gal”


Armaan’s extremely lovely and soft voice was unusal for esha’s ears and so her deeply sleeping brain hardly ordered any of her nerves to wake up. Armaan patted on her cheeks and spoke again.
His hands denied to move away from her soft skin and he simply kept soothing her cheeks. HE himself didnt realise why he wanted her so much at that moment. He kept reminiscing every moment he spent with her in past 1 year. the way their friendshop boosted and how she became a part of his life. And how she was a lilltle devil and angel at the same time for him. How he annoyed her ..at times to an extent which was out of her capacity to handle. .
the more he hated himself ...the more he felt the existence of love for her in his mechanically working heart.
He was falling for her more and more with every second.He finally realized what he wanted and what he was missing. He kissed her forehead and got his laptop in front of him.
The night passed and the clock stoke 10 in the morning.


“ excuse me!! Hello….guyz wake up!! “ a gal spoke as she shook esha .
Esha opened her eyes and found armaan’s face on her side. She then put her head up and answered to the gal… “yes?”


“Can I use the charging point if incase your laptops are charged ?” the gal smiled .


“Sure” esha said and got up to took her charger off the switch board.


“fuck! Its afternoon! Armaaaaaaaaaaaan!!! Wake up!! Dude …..we are dead…wake up!!! “ she screamed as she realized about the hour.


“GET UP!! “ she doddered him .the girl who was standing for the charger as well as the other people in their vicinity fixed their eyes on the fresh morning entertainment show.
Armaan woke up and gave her a smile.


“you are smiling. WE ARE SCREWED ARMAAN. Its 10 AM …u ge t that 10 AM!!! We were supposed to submit the draft by 9!!! And at latest reach the college before 11! We are not even done with the ending. “ bewildered esha kept howling.


“calm down sweety . nothing’s wrong…. Everything’s on track.” Armaan said as he kept his head down on the desk again for a nap.


“ you are still in your dreams.. armaan !! we have not submitted the draft.!! “


“ I did. Actually aman did. He ought to give me a return birthday gift” he winked .
“whaaat?”


“Yes” armaan announced it proudly keeping his head on his palm .


“and you completed the story without me” she was almost crying.


“ yeah..i tried waking you up ..but you were sleeping very deeply.”


“ you could have thrown a glass of water on my face. How can you do it armaan ….how can you end the story without my acknowledgment. You know it very well that for me it was something more than a competition….it was the first grand platform for my writing thing. You have really hurt me. “ she said packing her bag and stood up to leave her place. Even the girl standing next to them and the only viewer remained of the chit chat show gave armaan a disgusting look as if saying “all men are dogs”.


“Hey hey….hold on” he reached for her hand and stopped her.


“trust me…it cant end it without you. Just keep your faith in me for next 2 hours and then I ll accept whatever you decide.the end is still not ended” armaan said holding her face in his hands.


“I m not getting you. You said you have sent the final draft. Now only jugmnent time is left . be more clear armaan.” She demanded.


“Lets move to the venue and talk” armaan pleaded.


“ ohk”


The gal standing next to their table was baffled by this time .


Stefen’s college , DU!


“They are gonna announce the result in next hour” armaan said esha giving him a glass of sof drink. ” They have made the top short listed stories public . its over there ..you can take a copy and read it! “ armaan pointed towards the stalls just 1o meters away from them.


“hmmm….. you are not coming? “


“ NO! I need to meet some of my friends in DU. They are waiting for me in cafeteria .join us when you are done.” Armaan spoke as he stood up.


“ohk .fine. but armaan m still not feeling good at it”


“I m sorry for everything. I hope you will write a better end than me. trust is all i can ask for” armaan left the place.


Esha went to the counter of the write-ups . after having a glance on other write ups she finally picked up the pages showing the red and black title “YOU”…. Some Destiny written by esha gupta and armaan Mehta. She took a deep breathe and sat on the chair to read the final draft of the most awaited dream. She went through the initial pages fastly as she was aware of the content . finally she turned the last part of the story titled ” m hoping….m waiting”
She started reading the lines…..she is still reading it… from the mention of their first meet till this line….she read about the last night and what change it is gonna present in her life…. she read everything…… she felt the touch of armaan's kiss the moment she read about it.
The dumbstruck gal kept reading and reached to the last lines of the write up….
“ now since you have read what my heart stores there is only one question I wish to ask ….. will you be my date?
I m madly in love with you sweetheart!
This was the end from my part and m still waiting for an end…. From your side.” em>